𝐌𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐓𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐲 𝐌𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐬 ...

Memories of my Rolfing Teacher Stacey Mills ...

Some background ...

In 1981 I changed careers. From a 12 year stint as an Ad Biggie on Mad Ave to Certified Rolfer; within a year's time. Quite a change, no? 

From a white collar field centered on visual and verbal parameters, to one based on manual labor. And, most certainly, way more soul. In Rolfing the manual labor is used to help move the Human body from a place of random imbalance to one of balance in alignment with the force of Gravity. Literally, like sculpting living clay. Hands on.

Interesting that from a career in marketing communications I go into a brand new, widely unknown career path with the built in challenge to communicate its benefits. It's one thing to introduce a new shampoo, or a new food product; quite another to birth the never before heard of; not just the identity "Rolfing", but the idea upon which it is based.

It's a clear moment when you realize your daily career activity will be putting your hands directly on people. As I said, especially when the previous career was all mental. But, with some nice lunches thrown in I will admit.

It did help that I had graduated with a bachelor's in Human Biology. My first academic love. 

At the time my career in advertising ended — I had a moment of honesty with myself and admitted that I didn't want to be that Can't Miss Top 10 World Class Mad Ave Ad Biggie no more. Everything changed around that one simple, clear admission; and fast — it seemed that the Universe had conspired to take me from a work centered on getting people to part with their cash to one of service and personal growth. "Rolfing!"

My Teacher Stacey Mills ...

Let me tell you about my Teacher, Stacey Mills. At the time she was the Grande Dame and Doyenne of the Rolfing community. A senior teacher at the Rolf Institute of Structural Integration which was headquartered in Boulder, Colorado. That's the school founded by the originator of Structural Integration, Dr. Ida P. Rolf. Now you know where "Rolfing" comes from.

Stacey was a Lady. Hair neatly coiffed close to the head. Just enough makeup; nails perfectly polished. Silk blouses. Simple, comfortable slacks. Precise, knowing, gentle touch. A cool, cool Scorpio. With a presence emanating depth and understanding. Very self contained, private. That's Scorpio. Funny, my ex-wife is a Scorpio and all the teachers in my training led by Stacey were also Scorpios. Kismet? Better behave around Scorpios ... stingers.

She was held in a kind of ga-ga high esteem in the Rolf community. It seemed a bit much, and that made me question it. My comment, "But, can she get down on all fours and bark like a dog?". I hope she could. But, the Lady was dignified and serious always. Wouldn't dare say that to her face.

Meeting Stacey ...

On the very first day of class in New York City I met Stacey Mills for the first time and presented her with a highly shined red Apple. She accepted it from me, without any trace of affect. Like you handed a mechanic a wrench needed for the job; or, a surgeon a scalpel. Whether my attempt at being endearing with my gesture of clever irony registered with her, who knows. I enjoyed it. It was a nice Apple. And, the class was in the Big Apple. 

Dancing with Stacey ...

Some of us called her "Spacey Stacey". Though she didn't talk about it, she was definitely one of those rare "psychic ladies". You know the kind who could read you deep into your karmic roots, with a library of study at her fingertips in the arcane; such as astrology, metaphysics, and other esoteric subjects. She had a knowing way. What she knew, who knows. 

About in the middle of the multi-week class schedule we all went to the Roseland Ballroom in Manhattan for an evening of dancing. I danced with Stacey. It was probably some bouncy pop tune and she was grooving to the vibes. Eyes closed, hands waving in the air; off in her own reverie. Like, we weren't grooving together. Just her. Perhaps in her own experince she was dancing with me, but it didn't seem that way to me. I stopped dancing ... cold. She opened her eyes and stopped too. It was abrupt. But, I too have dance in me. Not always groovy, but always in the groove. If you know what I mean. What do I mean? Believe me, I sure don't know. Who knows, I might have brought her back and saved her from floating off into the ethers.

Stacey's lecture assignments to the class ...

The Rolf Structural Integration format is taught as a 10 session process. Typically, a client comes once a week. I was given the class assignment to give a talk on the 6th session. I didn't know at the time what I knew. The 6th session I would characterize as having the theme, "Level". Remember, the main goal of the work is to balance the body — the whole Human being actually; but, you can get your hands on that body as a grounded surety — in respect to the dictates of Gravity. That means the segments of the body are stacked up easy on a simple vertical line. For that, things need to be symmetrical and level. It's at the point of the 6th session that things need to get level. The next session focuses on the upper head area, so you want to be sure there's a place to put a level head. Kapische?

My talk featured emphasis on "vectors". Tensional imbalances in the fabric of the body that pull away from the central vertical. It's a whole thing to discuss what that's about; suffice to say that we accumulate the slings and arrows of living and store them in the body. Insufficient learning, bad habits, accidents, traumas, modelling after our significant others; like that.

After I gave my talk I saw Stacey raise her eyebrows. Maybe with some eyes, like you make when you have a reaction to something. What her reaction was, who knows. Inscrutable as she was. I don't think it was a response to my brilliance. After several decades in this craft I look back and in fact see the truth of it. But then, I was stabbing a bit in the dark with my concept. My take at the time was her response had something to do with how full of shit I was. Or, maybe — mirabile dictu — it was over her head? Our teachers sometimes can seem to be as gods. But, like any good teacher knows, your students teach you too. Maybe she was amazed at my brilliance after all?

If that transaction left me with anything, it was what Stacey would say to me at the end of my training. In essence, some things are better left unanswered. So, I'll let go wondering about how she took it. Like I said, those Scorpios don't seem to show their cards much. 

Graduation dinner ...

At the successful end of the training the students and the teachers got together for a dinner party. At the assistant teacher Rosemary Feitis' sprawling Upper West Side West End Avenue apartment. 

Stacey prepared the meal. Braised Pig Feet. A kulinary koan if ever there was one. Pig's feet? Huh? Truth be told, I thoroughly enjoyed the meal. What, if anything the others at the table thought of it, I don't know. We didn't gossip about things after the fact. But, as you would think, a celebratory dinner with Pig's feet? Not exactly the first thing that comes to mind planning for such an event. As was usual for me, it did cause me to wonder whether there was some message buried in that stew. And, back to the main lesson. Let the question go. I didn't have a sense of relationship enough with Stacey to ask her what she was thinking. Simply remember a delicious dish.

The class party ...

We had the class party at Anatomy Teacher Louis Schulz's apartment in the Village. Teachers, students, class models, friends and family. 

Stacey gifted the newly certified Rolfers T-shirts with

tiger and zebra stripes printed on the full fronts. I imagined the image could be interpreted as a finger print. The hand of God? Maybe. Who knows.

At the time somehow I was taken with making jewelry with brass safety pins. There were six students in the class. I affixed six small pins to one larger and made it into a decoration you could wear as jewelry. I told Stacey it was a puzzle [six students, one teacher]. She replied, "Some puzzles aren't meant to be solved". Another teaching moment, for sure. Swaha! Let it go!

As I said, Stacey dressed well. Stylish, but not too showy; quality choices. At the party she wore a black velvet cat suit, with large red roses dotting here and there. On her backside a very large full bloom red rose covered the entirety. Not to be missed. What that was all about, again, who knows. Stacey at the time was a woman of a certain age. I think she still had it going on. But, I wasn't inclined to open that trick box. My own psychic chops hadn't yet been cooked enough to suss that puzzlement. To this day, can't say.

My cry for help ...

Early in my Rolfing career it wasn't going swimmingly. All my own bridges were burned, and the friends and colleagues from my previous life weren't exactly the sort that would embrace something as radically new as Rolfing. So much for creativity in the so-called creative world of Advertising. Geez! Much less, that all of them didn't embrace me much to begin with. Not much fertile soil in my section of the farm. Mostly rocks to be cleared. Like I said, this career has a lot to do with personal development. When life gives you karmic rocks you learn to rock your karma. I'm still at it. Thankfully, now. Back then, it was a difficult challenge.

I called Stacey on the telephone to make contact. Not sure what I wanted, or how to even express it. When she answered and I identified myself she asked, "What can I do for you?". A little stunned at the directness and flatness of how she put it, I said, "I just wanted to tell you I love you". I don't recall what, if any, response she had to that. It did seem to soften my sense of relationship with her, however.

A Rolf Institute annual meeting ...

A few years into my career as a Rolfer I attended a workshop at the school in Boulder, Colorado. Followed by a big party at the conclusion of the membership annual meeting. Afterward Stacey thanked me "for sharing myself". 

Lovely acknowledgment. Thank you. And bless you.

Our last time together, planetary-wise ...

In her last years Stacey Mills lived in an assisted living community in New Jersey. She probably would have been medically diagnosed with dementia. We visited. I was eager to show her the piece I had written for prospective clients. No purchase on that. She seemed to be on some other plane. "Spacey Stacey." We took a walk together around the sprawling facility. At one point we got lost. She said "You are going to embarrass yourself", going off like we were in the wrong direction in the maze of corridors at the facility. I said nothing. Knowing that just being there was all there was ... and, being there with her. 

Concluding thoughts ...

Sometimes I can see Stacey looking through my eyes. I hope she enjoys the view. Who knows. Not for me to concern about her experience. But, my own. Knowing and trusting that that will please my Teacher.

PS There emerged in this recollection a theme. Not knowing. There was so much about Stacey Mills which to me was inscrutable. As I have matured it is dawning on me that not knowing is the true condition. That we confuse and complicate in our quest for so-called understanding. Yet, in not knowing, we can look at a situation in the present moment with fresh, unfiltered eyes. And trust in our ability to respond appropriately and effectively. To be responsible. That's what the field of Rolf Structural Integration is all about. Learning to live in a healthy balance, a balance based on the universal principal of the Law of Gravity. Appropriate. Responsible ... able to respond.

Some Teacher, huh?

𝐈𝐬 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐥?

 

Good question. And, perfectly understandable. A lot of people have the same concern. Even some who have been "Rolfed" say it's painful. What they don't usually mention is that the experience is about pain leaving. Or, that there can be occasional intensity, but not something hurtful. But, as a client you are in charge. Everything proceeds with your permission and acceptance. That's the plain fact. 

Have you ever had an experience of pain leaving? Or, moving into a place of discomfort and discovering just out of being willing to go there it transforms from pain to pleasure? Try it, you'll like it.

This will answer the big question to your complete satisfaction. You don't want to miss choosing to do something good for youself out of a simple misunderstanding. Wrong information. Do you?

Okay? Let's unpack the question ...

But it does depend on three things: 

What do you mean by is? 

What do you mean by Rolfing? 

And, what do you mean by painful?

That may sound like a smart-ass answer, but a few things need to be cleared up and given the necessary context. That understanding will settle the question. Promise.

"Is"

What is the "is" in question? What's the "is-sue"? 

Your body. Every Human body. Any Human body.

We're talking about the individual Human being and their condition in simple, basic bodily terms. In this case, it's about its condition in respect to how it stacks architecturally. What it takes for that arrangement to live in a normal healthy relationship to the constant and ever present force of Gravity. It's that simple. 

Let's take a look. There's  balance, and there's out of balance? Frankly, usually a mix of both. Typical patterns: head forward ... one shoulder higher ... ministry of funny walks.  Those imbalances, though ... ouch! They can be painful. Not to mention the compensations necessary to keep everything together.

How do we look at the body as a structure? What do we look for? 

The body has an anatomical design, its natural and healthy architectural arrangment. There is a set of definite relationships of the many segmented parts; that is ... feet, legs, hips, belly, chest, shoulders, hands, arms, neck, head. This arrangment as a whole stacks up and operates under the influence of Gravity. Just like any physical structure on Earth. We know the rules of Gravity for our buildings. Same for the Human body. Vertical, symmetrical, even. Bada bing!

Imbalances often occur. Bad habits, unresolved accidents and traumas, lack of training, no training — we're self-taught mostly [who taught you how to stand, to sit, to walk?] — modelling significant others who may not have been themselves good examples of balance in the makeup of their own bodies. 

These arrangements accumulate over time, and unless resolved or corrected, they get set into the fabric of the flesh. Such imbalances report themselves as chronic pains and stress. Limited range, sub-par performance, lack of creativity. 

This is what the orginator, Dr. Ida P. Rolf said about that: "Some individuals may perceive their losing fight with gravity as a sharp pain in their back, others as the unflattering contour of their body, others as constant fatigue, yet others as an unrelentingly threatening environment. Those over forty may call it old age. And yet all these signals may be pointing to a single problem so prominent in their own structure, as well as others, that it has been ignored: they are off balance, they are at war with Gravity."

It's plain to see looking at any individual's body in terms of how well it stacks up along the straight line vertical; also looking for necessary symmetries, and levels-evenness front to back.  

In summary, the "is" in Rolfing is your body and it's alignment in respect to the dictates of Gravity. 

"Rolfing"

Rolfing is a legal service mark name held by the Dr. Ida Rolf Institute. It's one of the schools in the field known as Structural Integration. While the question was put regarding "Rolfing" this answers for the entire field of Structural Integration.

Structural Integration is a definitive and peerless approach to Human balance. Unique in that its main goal is to balance the body with the Gravitational field of the Earth. As such. Sure, anything you do that's good for you contributes to balance. But, bodily balance as such, that's the whole Enchilada in Structural Integration. While we have the innate ability to heal and become whole, other than Structural Integration there is no other formal method designed to address whole body balance along the lines of the demands of Gravity. Repeating ... as such. 

Dr. Rolf, put it this way: "This is the gospel of Rolfing^®: When the body gets working appropriately, the force of Gravity can flow through. Then, spontaneously, the body heals itself." 

As is well known, the Human body takes its shape over time through lived experience. On average it's a random bag. We arrive at adulthood with a mix of balance and imbalance fixed into our flesh. 

Balance is normal and healthy. Imbalances require compensations. "Dis-ease." These, unless resolved, set in and we find ourselves living in patterns which are inefficient, limiting performance and creativity, and sapping vital energy to maintain. Ouch! That's painful! Yet, we can be seduced to accepting this as "Just the way I am". That there is no alternative. 

Well ...

Good News! The Human body has a plastic quality. It has taken the shape you're in, and it can be reshaped.

You may be wondering if that's the "painful" part. The reshaping. Stay tuned. No problemo. 

Structural Integration offers individualized assistance to bring the body to a naturally effortless, graceful upright stance; with ease, flexibility, and fluidity. As Dr. Rolf put it, "So you should be easy in your harness".

So much more could be said, but this should suffice. When you decide to do something constructive to bring this kind of balance into your life, all your other questions can be answered. You can add a comment/question below this post.

So now, let's talk about the Elephant in the room.

"Painful"

"Just what do I have to do today to get you into a balanced body?"

Most people look at things like Structural Integration as a therapy. I got a problem; I need it fixed. I've tried everything, maybe this'll do it? With medical attention and therapies typically something is done to you. You're a passive recipient. You take your medicine. You take the shot. Get a procedure done to you. Go under the knife.

Strutural Integration is a system using manual touch and guided self-movement. Rather than "fixing" a symptom, chronic problems get resolved out of fostering that head to toe balance in the whole body.  And, the big difference is that in terms of dealing with "painful" in Structural Integration you are in control*. 

If at any time the contact in a session of Structural Integration is unacceptable, for any reason — whether it be the manual touch itself or the movement instruction —  the process works best when you speak up for yourself. Then the practitioner can change the pace, ease up, slow down, or stop. Net, net ... you are in control. It's your body after all. Your limits are always respected.

That should settle the question on "painful".

But maybe a little more about what is pain. It's a big subject.

We all know pain. It can vary in intensity. An itch, temporary annoyance, a twinge, a chonic persistent ache, to a stop-the-world-I-want-to-get-off 10 on a 10 point scale.

Pain is first a physical sensation. Yet, we give it meaning, have pictures for it. Have stories that tell how it got there. Have situations, places and people who trigger painful feelings. In other words, pain comes packaged. There's the physical felt sense, and the psychological/mental and emotional components too. Getting rid of pain sometimes depends on where to open that package.

This is important to mention since Structural Integration is what's called a "somatic" method. As such, it addresses the whole Human being, but grounded in Anatomy and Physics. There may be a psychological/emotional component but we can get our hands on the body. Knock on wood. Balance the body, balance the mind. The body/mind apparatus is a unity; it all goes together.

*Structural Integration is taught in schools recognized by the International Association of Structural Integrators. An important distinction about this approach is that it is not a therapy. That said, yes, bringing a higher order of balance into the makeup of the Human body may have therapeutic effects. But, the work is a teaching. A training, to learn to live in balance in tangible, and noticeable ways. This is something you take away from the process. As an experience. It's not just intellectual, conceptual. It's perceptual. You own it much in the same way you own how to ride a bike, swim, juggle. Or anything else you've learned to do, and now it's set in muscle memory. 

And, since the method is instructional, you participate. You learn. You put in effort. That's very different from many of the things you can do for yourself therapeutically. 

It takes doing. An effort on your part.

So, what are you waiting for?

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 "𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐀𝐜𝐞" 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

Following are the verbatim exchanges after me "trolling" a Facebook post on the breaking news that "Scientists have received an “extremely exciting” gravitational-wave signal from the distant universe.

The story is about gravitational waves so I figured there was an opening for your "Gravity Ace" to add some pertinent information.

And, so it went. Listen ... 

["Gravity Ace" and various interlocutors]

"Gravity Ace": "I work professionally in a field which fosters Human living in respect to the force of Gravity; that is according to the design of Anatomy and the laws of Physics in how the human body structure is designed. The average individual is off kilter from that basic well known standard. Yet, it's still news that has yet to be delivered. Perhaps the scientists could take their eye off the microscope and the telescope and look for something closer to home, and plainly obvious?"

"What??"

"You could explain what your job actually is in plain English for a start, because frankly as it reads it seems you need experts in ergonomics or furniture design rather than scientists. And I’m not sure how it’s relevant to the story anyway." 

"GA": "The relevance for me is in how we're off looking telescopically far away and microscopically way in, but we're also needing to look into things right in front of our nose. Or, in technology, sending rockets on a project to get to Mars, when we have some work to do here which is slightly more at hand. And, necessary.

"Also ... in terms of describing what it is that I'm presenting, let me rephrase: We know scientifically the Human body is designed for an arrangement that is stacked up easy and simple, with things even and level. In the trades all structures at their center must obey "Plumb & Square". As I said, the Human body structure exists in the same situation as any building. If you care to take a look around from the point of view of that particular standard, you'll see for yourself the situation. My point is that is something so obvious, yet overlooked.

" –Ida P. Rolf, PhD:

'Some individuals may perceive their losing fight with gravity as a sharp pain in their back, others as the unflattering contour of their body, others as constant fatigue, yet others as an unrelentingly threatening environment. Those over forty may call it old age. And yet all these signals may be pointing to a single problem so prominent in their own structure, as well as others, that it has been ignored: they are off balance, they are at war with gravity.' "

"A wizard did it?"

"GA": "Did it ... did what? Please."

Response:



"Cool story, my bro. Why'd you make it up?"

"GA": "I made it up to share some good news."

"I've rarely seen anyone so desperate to sound knowledgeable and enlightened, whilst spewing a ludicrous drool of nonsensical gibberish. I should have guessed you were a Rolfer, before you dropped the quote."

"GA": "What is it about living in balance with the natural fact of Gravity that is gibberish? Out of balance, that's some real desperation. For balance, you don't need a Rolfer. But there is something to it about getting engaged with learning the basic skill of living adapted to the demands of Gravity."

"What's "about" it is the ludicrous pseudo-science that's inspired you to put together string after string of words that really don't mean anything at all. Much like your "profession" of providing the gullible and desperate with nothing whatsoever of any worth."

"GA": "I appreciate your candor. And your perseverance being in discussion with me. I am in the process of learning how to get my idea(s) across. Thank you for giving me a opportunity to make myself clear. Understand, I leave it to you whether you agree or not, and respect whatever is your choice.

"Admitting that not everyone is my customer, let me say this: Besides offering individualized training to transform the arrangement of the body to it's design potential for verticality, symmetry, and level front/back; the message of Dr. Ida P. Rolf is as simple as a mud fence: Scientifically we understand that Human bodies are designed for architectural balance [as described previously]. We grow bigger and stronger as we mature; structure is to a great extent developmental. We are shaped by our experience. Literally, both body and mind.

"Most come to maturity with a random mix of imbalances fixed into the fabric of the flesh. Since the body is plastic — it takes shape — it restores itself with a little attention toward the normal pattern [as described]. Forget Rolfing. [BTW "Rolfing" is a nickname for Dr. "Rolf". The actual name of the field she originated is "Structural Integration".]

"Forget Structural Integration as something I do that you have to pay me for. As I attempted to make clear is there’s the simple choice to engage in the process of growing to live adapted to the dictates of Gravity.

"This is a new idea in the culture. Works for me. Disagree or not. The fact of the constant and ever presence of Gravity is well known in science. Common sense, really. And, it’s action. You've heard of that falling Apple? What’s not so much in the discussion is the question of how we Humans are in the makeup of our bodies dealing with that. Gravity has a program. The message is ... "Get with it". "

Afterthought:

Admittedly, no one has asked a question, yet I offered an answer attempting to elicit a question. Every one is at a different place on the Path, and different level of understanding. Your "Gravity Ace" is in a project to not only get across that balance in respect to Gravity is a good thing, and possible; he's also learning in that process just what the fuck it takes to get something so plainly obvious across to the average Joe and Jane. It does seem that the first task is to open minds. It's not just a question — even though the name on the jacket is "Gravity Ace" — a question of Gravity, but also of what else may be so obvious it escapes our distracted notice. Meanwhile the best you "Gravity Ace" can do is continue to engage in the process of consigning the body to Gravity himself. As an exemplar, that may be the most telling. And, yet, he do like to mince the words. Light a candle. [Which, come to think of it, has to be straight and true to burn long and bright.]

Substituting "King" in Robert Frost's brilliant poem : How hard it is to keep from being "Gravity Ace" when it's in you and in the situation.

𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 "𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐀𝐜𝐞" ... 𝐈𝐝𝐞𝐚 𝐌𝐚𝐧

 

𝐖𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐛𝐲 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐚𝐥, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐫𝐭/𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐟𝐭.

𝐒𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐫, 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐲 ...

𝐏𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞, 𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫, 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐬. 𝐒𝐨 ... 𝐏𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐇𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐰𝐧 "𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐀𝐜𝐞", 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐚 𝐥𝐚𝐛 𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 "𝐁𝐢𝐠-𝐁𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫".

𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐀𝐜𝐮𝐩𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 "𝐁𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫" 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐬𝐞𝐚 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐮𝐢𝐭, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐦𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐩𝐬 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭. 𝐎𝐤𝐚𝐲, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐏𝐚𝐯𝐥𝐨𝐯 𝐦𝐢𝐱𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞.

𝐒𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬. 𝐒𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐩𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐞. "𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 ... 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝."

𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 "𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐀𝐜𝐞" 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲'𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲.

𝐊𝐞𝐲 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝: "𝐃𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬"

𝐒𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞, 𝐚 𝐬𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐲𝐨𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤'𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.

𝐈𝐭 𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐬 𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐛𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐡 [𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬], 𝐢𝐧𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐦𝐢𝐜 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐲𝐦𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜 [𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐫𝐭] 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐧-𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐠𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐧-𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬, 𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞.

𝐎𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐞𝐲𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐀𝐈 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐮𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐚 𝐬𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐮𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞.

𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧! 𝐍𝐨, 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝟑𝟎𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐨𝐫. 𝐈𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐚 𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐕𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜 𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞.

𝐀𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐕𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜 𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝟕𝟐,𝟎𝟎𝟎 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭. 𝐈𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐞, 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐬, 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞?

𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐏. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐚𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐜 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲. 𝐈𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝, 𝐨𝐧𝐞-𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬. 𝐈𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞-𝐝𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥; 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬, 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥. 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢𝐧. 𝐃𝐫. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 “𝐎𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞”.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐞 — 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐥𝐲 𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 — 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐥 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐱. 𝐈𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐲𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲. 𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧, 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐬𝐩𝐮𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐚𝐫𝐧, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐤𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐚𝐦𝐚 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮. 𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐬 𝐌𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐍𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐤𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠?

𝐒𝐨 ... 𝐢𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝟕𝟐,𝟎𝟎𝟎 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐮𝐩 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞’𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬; 𝐚𝐧𝐝, 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐠.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐧 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐃𝐫. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐢𝐬 “𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜”. 𝐄𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞; 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐫𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝. 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜, 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐲. 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐭. 𝐃𝐫. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 “𝐆𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐬” 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧; 𝐚 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞. 𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞; 𝐚𝐧𝐝, 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞.

𝐒𝐨 𝐰𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐏. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐌𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐝 — 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐈𝐧 𝐚 𝐑𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐞 𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐜𝐮𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐨𝐚𝐥𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 [𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥] 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭. 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞; 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐢𝐭 ... “𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧”.

𝐒𝐨 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐮𝐫 “𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐨𝐫”. 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝-𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐢𝐫. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧 𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜 “𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬”. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐧𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐛𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 “𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐬”. 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐚𝐥𝐠𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐧 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐬. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧, 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬) 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧(𝐬) 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞. 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐮𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐰𝐞’𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐡; 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐞?

𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐨𝐫𝐲: 𝐒𝐞𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐱𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲. 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬: “𝐏𝐥𝐮𝐦𝐛 & 𝐒𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐞”. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐲. 𝐓𝐨 𝐰𝐢𝐭 ... 𝐄𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐮𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞, 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠, 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐞𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞. 𝐀𝐬 𝐚 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐏𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭: “𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥”. 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢𝐧. 𝐔𝐬𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲, 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬, 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝. 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨, 𝐬𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥. 𝐍𝐨. 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 ... 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝. 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐭. [𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐰𝐞 𝐚𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐭!]

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨 𝐰𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲? “𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧”. 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐞; 𝐛𝐮𝐭, 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐠𝐮𝐲 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐝 “𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞”.

𝐈𝐟 ... 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐒𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐒𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 — 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬, 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞; 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐝.

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐱𝐞𝐫𝐭 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐒𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐥𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐝𝐲𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐜𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭?

𝐂’𝐦𝐨𝐧, 𝐰𝐞’𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐱 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐤𝐬! 𝐒𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐝 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥’𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐛𝐨𝐲 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐝𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭. 𝐀𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐬. “𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐒𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 ... 𝐒𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲/𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧’𝐭 𝐚𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐞!”

𝐐𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐫: 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬? 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐏𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐲, 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐬, 𝐌𝐲𝐨𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞? 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐨.

“𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐀𝐜𝐞”: 𝐖𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 [𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬]. 𝐖𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥.

[𝐐]: 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥 ... ?

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐈 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐚 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤. 𝐀𝐧𝐲𝐡𝐨𝐰, 𝐈’𝐥𝐥 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐬. [𝐀 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐫 𝐣𝐨𝐤𝐞.]

𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬: 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥; 𝐛𝐮𝐭, 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫.

𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐏. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐌𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐝 — 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫.

[𝐐]: 𝐀𝐧𝐝 ... ?

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐨𝐧, 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞. 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰 ... 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐲. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬. 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞(𝐬).

[𝐐]: 𝐒𝐢𝐫! 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥!

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭?

[𝐐]: 𝐈’𝐦 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐚 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞!

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐞, 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐲. [𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥.] 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧.

[𝐐]: 𝐎𝐤𝐚𝐲. 𝐃𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐬𝐭.

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐁𝐲 “𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥” 𝐈’𝐦 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐨𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐚𝐮𝐥𝐭, 𝐟𝐢𝐱𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞(𝐬). 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐮𝐦𝐛 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐔𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐡. 𝐅𝐥𝐚𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝, 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬. “𝐇𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧”, 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐦𝐚 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐫, 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐩𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝.

[𝐐]: 𝐒𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 “𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐲” 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐭? 𝐈𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐮𝐭?

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐀𝐬𝐤𝐞𝐝, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝.

[𝐐]: 𝐒𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝, “𝐨𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬” 𝐚𝐧𝐝 “𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬”.

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 — 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 — 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐥𝐝, 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐥𝐝. 𝐊𝐚𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐞?

[𝐐]: 𝐊𝐚𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐞!

[“𝐆𝐀”]: 𝐒𝐨, 𝐥𝐞𝐭'𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 ...

[𝐀𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐢𝐧’𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭. 𝐈𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠!]

𝐁𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡! 𝐁𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐅𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭. 𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲. 𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬 "𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐥". 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐈, 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 "𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐀𝐜𝐞", 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐧 "𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲'𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡".

𝐍𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞. 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞 ... 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞, 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐚𝐯𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞. 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧'𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐞𝐭; "𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮" 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐮𝐧𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬.

𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧. 𝐈𝐭'𝐬 𝐚 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐳𝐞! [𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐚𝐧!] 𝐀 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐳𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐎𝐱𝐲𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐢𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 "𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐳𝐞" 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐯𝐚𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲'𝐬 𝐑𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐛𝐨𝐰.

𝐒𝐨, 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐟 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐝! 𝐁𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐏𝐢𝐠, 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐝 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬. 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐮𝐦𝐛. 

𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞. 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐬𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐥𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝, 𝐛𝐲 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐧, 𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞, "𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐮𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐬".

"𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐌𝐚𝐧 𝐈𝐧 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲"

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐢𝐪𝐮𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐰 "𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭" 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐏. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐌𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐝 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲, 𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧(𝐬).

𝐍𝐨, 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐝𝐞 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟐𝟏𝐬𝐭 𝐂𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐝𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 ... 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐠𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐨𝐞𝐬. 𝐈𝐟'𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 "𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠" 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐥.

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. 𝐎𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐚 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐨. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐥𝐠𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐦 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠.

𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐑: 𝐒𝐨, 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈 — 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲, 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 — 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐩𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲?

"𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐀𝐂𝐄": 𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐭, 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖, 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭?

[𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.]

𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐍𝐄𝐖𝐒!

𝐇𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧? 𝐒𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐏. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐀𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐦 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐭𝐨 "𝐧𝐮𝐝𝐠𝐞" [𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦] 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 "𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐭". 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 "𝐀𝐝𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝" 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤, 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐧.

𝐀𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐲𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐩; 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐲𝐩𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐬 — 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐝, 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐬. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧'𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫. 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝, 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐬.

𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐑: 𝐘𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 “𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐀𝐜𝐞”.

𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐀𝐂𝐄: 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐞.

𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐑: 𝐒𝐨, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧, 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 — 𝐨𝐫, 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫, 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 — 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭 ... 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲.

𝐆𝐀: 𝐆𝐞𝐞, 𝐈 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐚𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭. 𝐎𝐫, 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐥.

𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐑: 𝐎𝐤𝐚𝐲. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲. 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐈 𝐚𝐦. 𝐍𝐨?

𝐆𝐀: 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐩 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞!

𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧:

𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 “𝒎𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏” 𝐚𝐧𝐝 “𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏” 𝐚𝐧𝐝 “𝒔𝒖𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏”.

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐥𝐞𝐭’𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐬. 𝐋𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬. [𝐋𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.] 𝐈𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐯𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝.

𝐈𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐭, 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲 𝐭𝐨 “𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧” 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐦𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲.
𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 “𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧” 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲. 𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐯𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐝𝐨. 𝐎𝐫, 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐝𝐨. 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞, 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐟𝐮𝐥.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐫𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐧𝐞𝐰𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 “𝐬𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬” 𝐢𝐭𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟. 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐦𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭.

𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐑: 𝐒𝐢𝐠𝐧 𝐦𝐞 𝐮𝐩!

𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐃𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭

𝐄𝐥𝐯𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 ... 𝐄𝐥𝐯𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤!

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐞-𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧(𝐬).* 

𝐈’𝐦 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐈’𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐮𝐬𝐭. 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝 “𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬”, 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐛𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲. 𝐇𝐞𝐜𝐤, 𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚 𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐦 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐩 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 “𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬”. 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭, 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥.

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬. 𝐘𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲, 𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲. 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐲? 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐭?

𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚. 𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐲𝐞𝐬? 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲, 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬. 𝐓𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐬, 𝐢𝐟 𝐈 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲. 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦, 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧. 𝐀 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐱 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞, 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩, 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭, 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐧𝐞𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐜 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 "𝐎𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞" 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭𝐞𝐝-𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐞𝐛 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐬. 𝐓𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐲 “𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐨𝐞 𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐞” ... 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐞!

𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬. 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐰𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐝? 𝐎𝐮𝐭𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞, 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧? 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧’𝐭 [𝐲𝐞𝐭] 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫, 𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐲. 

𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐟, 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐡, 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐞𝐩, 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐬. 𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐭? 𝐂𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐬; 𝐛𝐮𝐭, 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜. 𝐈𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬? 𝐎𝐤𝐚𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐲. 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐢𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐭𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 [𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲] 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬. 𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 "𝐓𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲" 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈’𝐦 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐧/𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐔𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞. 𝐈𝐭 𝐠𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝. 𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐏𝐎𝐕. 

𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥, 𝐢𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐝𝐨 𝐢𝐧 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: 𝐑𝐞-𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲? 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐢𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐬𝐨, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐭𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞? 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐲 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐞. 𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭. 𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 ... 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞. 𝐄𝐚𝐬𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝.  

𝐀𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞, 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞. 𝐈𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐞𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐢𝐭𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐮𝐩𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝, 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞? 𝐄𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝, 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐥𝐩𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐡. 𝐂𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭, 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞. 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 ... 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞?

𝐒𝐨, 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬. 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧:

𝐈𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 ... 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫? 𝐎𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞! 𝐄𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐤𝐚! 𝐈𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐡! 𝐓𝐨𝐨 𝐨𝐛𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞. 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐭. 𝐎𝐫, 𝐆𝐨𝐝. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐲 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐞. 𝐀𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐬. 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲? 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐫 ... 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐞. 𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐢𝐭. 𝐃𝐢𝐠 𝐢𝐭?

𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬: 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐄𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐝, 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐡𝐮𝐡?

𝐌𝐲 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞. 𝐈 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝟏𝟑 𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 — 𝐲𝐞𝐬, 𝟏𝟑 ... 𝐬𝐨 𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟏𝟎’𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟏𝟏’𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝟏𝟐’𝐬. 𝐀 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 

𝐘𝐞𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐨. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝟏. 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬. 𝐀𝐧𝐝, 𝟐. 𝐂𝐮𝐫𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 "𝐀𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐲 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬"; 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 "𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐭" 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬.

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞. 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐝𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐛 𝐨𝐮𝐭. 𝐋𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐬 ... 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧® 𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐯𝐞. 𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬! 𝐏𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰.

𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐭 ... 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟏𝟑𝐭𝐡 𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠.

𝐀𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐬! 𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐭𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐥. 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬; 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐨. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐭. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞. 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬. 𝐖𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐲, “𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐥 𝐮𝐩 𝐚 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐇𝐚𝐦, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬!”

𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝? 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰.

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧® 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐢® 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐝® 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐢 𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐅𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐄𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐖𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐓𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐅𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲. 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐖𝐒𝐅𝐄𝐖𝐓𝐅. 

𝐖𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐲, “𝐒𝐮𝐫𝐞, 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ... 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐢 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐩!”

𝐍𝐁: 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐮 𝐨𝐟 𝐂𝐨𝐬𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐨𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝.

* 𝐈𝐧 𝟏𝟗𝟖𝟗 𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐝𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐏. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟'𝐬 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐆𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐳𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤. 𝐒𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐀𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐈𝐝𝐚'𝐬 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐤𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐱 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐧. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐭𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐭𝐞. 𝐈𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐫. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟'𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐞𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥? 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐫. 𝐈𝐝𝐚 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐭𝐞 — "𝐖𝐞 𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐇𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬®" — 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐃𝐫. 𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐟'𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐝; 𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡, 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 "𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬". 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲'𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐢𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐚 "𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐞-𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝" 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐬𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐏𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐌𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐧 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬. 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐬𝐦 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐀𝐡, 𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲! 𝐀𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞, 𝐈'𝐦 𝐚 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ... 𝐛𝐮𝐭, 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞.

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